








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 106 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 75 matches | ||
| Premier | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Faceit | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 15 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




15 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1116 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,830 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 278 | 10% |
| Smokes | 559 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 1195 | 42% |
| Molotovs | 798 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $473,011 of utility $179 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 144 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Johanes_5 | 66% | 41 |
| #2 | kungpao <3 | 64% | 11 |
| #3 | SanaS | 50% | 12 |
| #4 | Kape | 50% | 82 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Johanes_5 | 66% | 41 |
| #2 | kungpao <3 | 64% | 11 |
| #3 | SanaS | 50% | 12 |
| #4 | Kape | 50% | 82 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Johanes_5 | 2 | 0.0026 |
| #2 | Kape | 1 | 0.0008 |
| #3 | kungpao <3 | 1 | 0.0049 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Johanes_5 | 98 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| #2 | kungpao <3 | 28 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| #3 | Kape | 22 | 0.02 | 1 min |
| #4 | SanaS | 3 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Johanes_5 | +3.09 | 83 | 70 |
| #2 | kungpao <3 | +1.25 | 63 | 65 |
| #3 | Kape | +1.02 | 66 | 43 |
| #4 | Gujandr | -0.32 | 80 | 48 |
| #5 | SanaS | -0.55 | 63 | 38 |





