








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 125 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 228 matches | ||
| Premier | 70 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




20 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4503 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,460 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1917 | 26% |
| Smokes | 2257 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 1628 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 1658 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,426,301 of utility $188 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 17 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | ///Miko | 56% | 25 |
| #8 | Quadir | 55% | 285 |
| #9 | FTxx | 55% | 131 |
| #10 | szczery | 53% | 66 |
| #11 | dako | 47% | 34 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Quadir | 8 | 0.0013 |
| #2 | FTxx | 8 | 0.0027 |
| #3 | krasuf | 7 | 0.0015 |
| #4 | DYNAM1TEEEE | 6 | 0.0015 |
| #5 | dako | 6 | 0.0077 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DYNAM1TEEEE | +2.88 | 91 | 46 |
| #2 | Quadir | +0.79 | 76 | 67 |
| #3 | krasuf | +0.76 | 85 | 68 |
| #4 | Co0kenS | +0.43 | 90 | 52 |
| #5 | szczery | +0.11 | 69 | 60 |





