








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 775 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 334 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 17 matches | ||
| Faceit | 11 matches | ||
| Wingman | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Golden | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 113 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




44 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4749 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,140 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2198 | 24% |
| Smokes | 2163 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 2583 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 2196 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,010,643 of utility $203 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 266 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | McDs CEO Manager to the Manager | 58% | 26 |
| #2 | FentMaxxing | 52% | 132 |
| #3 | Hank | 51% | 37 |
| #4 | <9 Fl8tio✌ | 44% | 122 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | McDs CEO Manager to the Manager | 58% | 26 |
| #2 | FentMaxxing | 52% | 132 |
| #3 | Hank | 51% | 37 |
| #4 | <9 Fl8tio✌ | 44% | 122 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | <9 Fl8tio✌ | 17 | 0.0065 |
| #2 | Hank | 13 | 0.0164 |
| #3 | FentMaxxing | 6 | 0.0021 |
| #4 | McDs CEO Manager to the Manager | 3 | 0.0051 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | <9 Fl8tio✌ | 412 | 0.16 | 10 min |
| #2 | FentMaxxing | 404 | 0.14 | 12 min |
| #3 | Hank | 83 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #4 | McDs CEO Manager to the Manager | 62 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Faidツ | +1.33 | 76 | 47 |
| #2 | McDs CEO Manager to the Manager | +0.58 | 61 | 60 |
| #3 | <9 Fl8tio✌ | +0.47 | 49 | 60 |
| #4 | FentMaxxing | -1.18 | 40 | 70 |
| #5 | Hank | -3.64 | 24 | 42 |





