








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 143 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Nuke | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




19 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
310 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,594 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 577 | 36% |
| Smokes | 446 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 394 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 177 | 11% |
Our logs show you have wasted $210,398 of utility $195 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 106 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | still water | 34% | 41 |
| #5 | Claire Nortan | 24% | 17 |
| #6 | off the goop | 19% | 37 |
| #7 | LAPTOPUSER | 13% | 8 |
| #8 | Big Large | 0% | 3 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | still water | 27 | 0.0346 |
| #2 | Claire Nortan | 11 | 0.0396 |
| #3 | off the goop | 10 | 0.0134 |
| #4 | bleachmegafan36 | 4 | 0.0082 |
| #5 | bleach enjoyer | 3 | 0.0118 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bleachmegafan36 | +4.33 | 87 | 49 |
| #2 | Claire Nortan | +1.28 | 87 | 27 |
| #3 | still water | +0.11 | 61 | 56 |
| #4 | mid ass GFX artist | -1.17 | 29 | 55 |
| #5 | off the goop | -1.36 | 57 | 50 |





