










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 0 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.

| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 271 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Wingman | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Premier | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 12 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4046 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,691 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2068 | 27% |
| Smokes | 1948 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 2225 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 1450 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,361,536 of utility $202 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1271 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mälläri (: | 81% | 21 |
| #2 | radekbonk11 | 74% | 35 |
| #3 | ninski | 62% | 76 |
| #4 | ๋ | 56% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mälläri (: | 81% | 21 |
| #2 | radekbonk11 | 74% | 35 |
| #3 | ninski | 62% | 76 |
| #4 | ๋ | 56% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ninski | 1 | 0.0005 |
| #2 | radekbonk11 | 1 | 0.0006 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ninski | 315 | 0.15 | 9 min |
| #2 | radekbonk11 | 246 | 0.14 | 8 min |
| #3 | mälläri (: | 114 | 0.15 | 3 min |
| #4 | ๋ | 39 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | k1mble | +2.41 | 75 | 56 |
| #2 | mälläri (: | +2.40 | 75 | 68 |
| #3 | ๋ | +0.55 | 88 | 55 |
| #4 | radekbonk11 | -0.60 | 59 | 73 |
| #5 | ninski | -1.56 | 68 | 60 |





