








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 847 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 106 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 101 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 89 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 80 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 70 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 59 matches | ||
| Faceit | 46 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 127 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




56 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6550 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 37,868 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 11940 | 32% |
| Smokes | 9984 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 8355 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 7589 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,241,747 of utility $79 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1747 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | manoPIG | 69% | 205 |
| #2 | G4rUpA | 65% | 146 |
| #3 | Senhor do Camarote | 61% | 105 |
| #4 | c3h5n3o9 ƪ(˘⌣˘)ʃ | 61% | 56 |
| #5 | alan1337 | 61% | 299 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | madruguinha | 59% | 690 |
| #8 | GhostOfSparta | 56% | 199 |
| #9 | dsr | 50% | 54 |
| #10 | ✪ Marron | 48% | 174 |
| #11 | Walter Cooler | 42% | 95 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | madruguinha | 51 | 0.0036 |
| #2 | manoPIG | 27 | 0.0064 |
| #3 | alan1337 | 16 | 0.0026 |
| #4 | Delise | 12 | 0.0014 |
| #5 | ✪ Marron | 12 | 0.0034 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | madruguinha | 3727 | 0.27 | 104 min |
| #2 | GhostOfSparta | 996 | 0.24 | 29 min |
| #3 | manoPIG | 936 | 0.22 | 22 min |
| #4 | Delise | 605 | 0.07 | 17 min |
| #5 | alan1337 | 507 | 0.08 | 9 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | manoPIG | +1.91 | 75 | 63 |
| #2 | Senhor do Camarote | +1.70 | 85 | 56 |
| #3 | G4rUpA | +1.49 | 81 | 60 |
| #4 | madruguinha | +1.10 | 70 | 70 |
| #5 | ★ frOnt ★ | +0.87 | 74 | 73 |





