








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 196 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 45 matches | ||
| Faceit | 36 matches | ||
| Premier | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1037 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,024 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 645 | 21% |
| Smokes | 654 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 771 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 954 | 32% |
Our logs show you have wasted $264,230 of utility $115 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 3 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | choke | 73% | 11 |
| #2 | Fristu | 50% | 24 |
| #3 | sad mops | 43% | 30 |
| #4 | Kawi | 43% | 14 |
| #5 | sad tiger | 43% | 28 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | choke | 73% | 11 |
| #2 | Fristu | 50% | 24 |
| #3 | sad mops | 43% | 30 |
| #4 | Kawi | 43% | 14 |
| #5 | sad tiger | 43% | 28 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kawi | 94 | 0.34 | 2 min |
| #2 | sad mops | 56 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #3 | Fristu | 52 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #4 | sad tiger | 28 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #5 | choke | 5 | 0.03 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | choke | +4.29 | 81 | 28 |
| #2 | Fristu | +1.08 | 78 | 68 |
| #3 | R0Zb1 | +0.64 | 56 | 52 |
| #4 | sad mops | +0.43 | 74 | 72 |
| #5 | Kawi | -1.27 | 72 | 73 |





