










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 99 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




0 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Your loyalty is impressive.
493 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,078 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 582 | 28% |
| Smokes | 564 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 462 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 470 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $101,599 of utility $112 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 10 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KalubeR | 100% | 4 |
| #2 | tissue | 81% | 16 |
| #3 | AwaykeN | 75% | 4 |
| #4 | hazza | 71% | 7 |
| #5 | blocker | 71% | 21 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | h4rn | 67% | 3 |
| #9 | imp | 56% | 9 |
| #10 | ichigo | 50% | 4 |
| #11 | Patrick | 40% | 5 |
| #12 | SPELLAN | 33% | 3 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hazza | 2 | 0.0150 |
| #2 | miteww | 1 | 0.0025 |
| #3 | AwaykeN | 1 | 0.0115 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | miteww | 83 | 0.20 | 2 min |
| #2 | blocker | 74 | 0.17 | 2 min |
| #3 | tissue | 65 | 0.21 | 2 min |
| #4 | imp | 52 | 0.23 | 1 min |
| #5 | hazza | 31 | 0.23 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | rafftu | +5.54 | 69 | 68 |
| #2 | ichigo | +4.66 | 98 | 52 |
| #3 | KalubeR | +3.56 | 89 | 63 |
| #4 | tissue | +2.83 | 96 | 45 |
| #5 | niki1 | +2.60 | 89 | 81 |





