








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 280 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 45 matches | ||
| Wingman | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1382 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 977 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 416 | 43% |
| Smokes | 286 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 168 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 107 | 11% |
Our logs show you have wasted $458,365 of utility $179 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 166 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jeikz | 63% | 24 |
| #2 | Keit | 63% | 24 |
| #3 | Na´Vi Official ✅ | 57% | 14 |
| #4 | BapeHuk | 50% | 88 |
| #5 | kunstnareN | 46% | 65 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BapeHuk | 8 | 0.0045 |
| #2 | Na´Vi Official ✅ | 5 | 0.0190 |
| #3 | Mr буба шлёп | 3 | 0.0098 |
| #4 | 集中的なマイナー | 2 | 0.0062 |
| #5 | m0zila | 2 | 0.0096 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kunstnareN | 468 | 0.35 | 14 min |
| #2 | BapeHuk | 176 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| #3 | Keit | 77 | 0.18 | 2 min |
| #4 | осьо otec | 43 | 0.19 | 1 min |
| #5 | Mr буба шлёп | 33 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | neqre | +1.74 | 72 | 33 |
| #2 | осьо otec | +1.67 | 26 | 34 |
| #3 | kunstnareN | +0.75 | 56 | 84 |
| #4 | m0zila | +0.32 | 60 | 34 |
| #5 | Keit | +0.18 | 42 | 49 |





