








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 17 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Nuke | 33 matches | ||
| Premier | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




24 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1085 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,633 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 941 | 58% |
| Smokes | 244 | 15% |
| HE Grenades | 175 | 11% |
| Molotovs | 273 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $152,654 of utility $47 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 69 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | L4rin 9/02 | 57% | 14 |
| #2 | El Gato Glocko | 47% | 159 |
| #3 | vTesla | 44% | 9 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | L4rin 9/02 | 57% | 14 |
| #2 | El Gato Glocko | 47% | 159 |
| #3 | vTesla | 44% | 9 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | El Gato Glocko | 26 | 0.0088 |
| #2 | L4rin 9/02 | 3 | 0.0103 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | El Gato Glocko | 949 | 0.32 | 25 min |
| #2 | L4rin 9/02 | 104 | 0.36 | 2 min |
| #3 | vTesla | 78 | 0.43 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | El Gato Glocko | +4.23 | 84 | 62 |
| #2 | vTesla | +3.89 | 77 | 67 |
| #3 | L4rin 9/02 | +1.16 | 78 | 57 |
| #4 | LoistBoy | -3.40 | 36 | 33 |





