










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 91 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 133 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 13 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
895 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,236 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 173 | 8% |
| Smokes | 516 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 1201 | 54% |
| Molotovs | 346 | 15% |
Our logs show you have wasted $475,730 of utility $133 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 146 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Birkiukas | 17 | 0.0071 |
| #2 | Pussy in the Bag | 12 | 0.0080 |
| #3 | 1xXHelheimXx3 | 7 | 0.0068 |
| #4 | mezurusu | 7 | 0.0113 |
| #5 | petrelis | 3 | 0.0012 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 1xXHelheimXx3 | +5.03 | 69 | 70 |
| #2 | petrelis | +1.22 | 48 | 54 |
| #3 | Pussy in the Bag | +0.31 | 18 | 43 |
| #4 | Birkiukas | +0.13 | 17 | 50 |
| #5 | NopEnopE | +0.09 | 39 | 60 |





