








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 290 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 160 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 13 matches | ||
| Faceit | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 10 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3503 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,282 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5417 | 41% |
| Smokes | 3096 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 1678 | 13% |
| Molotovs | 3091 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $723,120 of utility $102 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | cemppii | 55% | 88 |
| #2 | r0be- | 52% | 50 |
| #3 | Konu | 51% | 194 |
| #4 | satsumasakke | 49% | 255 |
| #5 | Naapuri Nasse | 47% | 75 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Konu | 12 | 0.0030 |
| #2 | satsumasakke | 6 | 0.0011 |
| #3 | akvaariokala | 5 | 0.0027 |
| #4 | cemppii | 5 | 0.0028 |
| #5 | Naapuri Nasse | 4 | 0.0027 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | r0be- | +2.11 | 60 | 77 |
| #2 | cemppii | +1.83 | 85 | 53 |
| #3 | Bätäng | +1.40 | 81 | 66 |
| #4 | Lepa | +0.40 | 67 | 64 |
| #5 | satsumasakke | -0.04 | 71 | 58 |





