








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 161 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 72 matches | ||
| Wingman | 30 matches | ||
| Premier | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1286 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,263 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 978 | 30% |
| Smokes | 1025 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 669 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 591 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $326,892 of utility $149 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 130 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rist LFT | 67% | 6 |
| #2 | zygi104_ | 63% | 43 |
| #3 | ironic | 58% | 38 |
| #4 | Kasia_Brylka | 52% | 21 |
| #5 | du du dupson | 50% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | zygi104_ | 2 | 0.0020 |
| #2 | jimmy buckets #ballin | 2 | 0.0027 |
| #3 | ironic | 1 | 0.0014 |
| #4 | Paweł | 1 | 0.0022 |
| #5 | Kasia_Brylka | 1 | 0.0023 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jimmy buckets #ballin | 163 | 0.22 | 5 min |
| #2 | zygi104_ | 151 | 0.15 | 4 min |
| #3 | ironic | 78 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| #4 | rusina | 57 | 0.18 | 1 min |
| #5 | Paweł | 33 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | faceitprongiger | +2.79 | 83 | 58 |
| #2 | ironic | +1.78 | 83 | 58 |
| #3 | jimmy buckets #ballin | +1.48 | 69 | 79 |
| #4 | Deduwa | +0.49 | 72 | 26 |
| #5 | zygi104_ | +0.34 | 74 | 61 |





