








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 605 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 184 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Faceit | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




43 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2845 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,088 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4197 | 38% |
| Smokes | 2906 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 1163 | 10% |
| Molotovs | 2822 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $670,260 of utility $113 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 59 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jari | 69% | 32 |
| #2 | Brass | 62% | 78 |
| #3 | thejanskugt | 51% | 127 |
| #4 | Rautalapio | 47% | 17 |
| #5 | hegemony_69 | 40% | 20 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | thejanskugt | 51% | 127 |
| #4 | Rautalapio | 47% | 17 |
| #5 | hegemony_69 | 40% | 20 |
| #6 | Detach | 37% | 19 |
| #7 | MUNCH | 28% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | thejanskugt | 25 | 0.0098 |
| #2 | hegemony_69 | 5 | 0.0130 |
| #3 | Jari | 4 | 0.0060 |
| #4 | Brass | 3 | 0.0019 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | thejanskugt | 378 | 0.15 | 6 min |
| #2 | Brass | 306 | 0.19 | 5 min |
| #3 | hegemony_69 | 97 | 0.25 | 1 min |
| #4 | Jari | 55 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #5 | Detach | 46 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Detach | +2.78 | 85 | 54 |
| #2 | jooseyks | +2.31 | 71 | 59 |
| #3 | Jari | +1.94 | 62 | 54 |
| #4 | Brass | -0.02 | 60 | 60 |
| #5 | Rautalapio | -2.42 | 16 | 40 |





