








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 17 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 170 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1011 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,529 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 229 | 15% |
| Smokes | 723 | 47% |
| HE Grenades | 50 | 3% |
| Molotovs | 527 | 34% |
Our logs show you have wasted $138,882 of utility $38 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 5 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | iKozlowz ∞ | 60% | 15 |
| #2 | ItzBarbee | 59% | 66 |
| #3 | Edward Norton (In Danger) | 50% | 16 |
| #4 | BigSyn ∞ | 48% | 239 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | iKozlowz ∞ | 60% | 15 |
| #2 | ItzBarbee | 59% | 66 |
| #3 | Edward Norton (In Danger) | 50% | 16 |
| #4 | BigSyn ∞ | 48% | 239 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BigSyn ∞ | 5 | 0.0014 |
| #2 | ItzBarbee | 2 | 0.0017 |
| #3 | iKozlowz ∞ | 1 | 0.0034 |
| #4 | Edward Norton (In Danger) | 1 | 0.0040 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BigSyn ∞ | 348 | 0.10 | 9 min |
| #2 | ItzBarbee | 98 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| #3 | Edward Norton (In Danger) | 18 | 0.07 | 0 min |
| #4 | iKozlowz ∞ | 8 | 0.03 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BigSyn ∞ | +3.59 | 74 | 52 |
| #2 | Edward Norton (In Danger) | +3.04 | 77 | 56 |
| #3 | ItzBarbee | +0.85 | 60 | 64 |
| #4 | iKozlowz ∞ | -3.32 | 48 | 33 |
| #5 | YoJonB ∞ | -3.78 | 46 | 18 |





