








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1405 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 367 matches | ||
| Wingman | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 85 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2903 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,072 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2912 | 22% |
| Smokes | 3281 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 3781 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 3098 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,409,849 of utility $142 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 26 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | monkey47 | 37% | 71 |
| #6 | squall.p | 37% | 134 |
| #7 | Fleska S'Pesnice 018 | 33% | 30 |
| #8 | Ora | 31% | 35 |
| #9 | BogdanBogi | 28% | 39 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | moze mi se | 11 | 0.0029 |
| #2 | monkey47 | 8 | 0.0054 |
| #3 | Babi22 | 4 | 0.0030 |
| #4 | squall.p | 3 | 0.0010 |
| #5 | Fleska S'Pesnice 018 | 2 | 0.0031 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | squall.p | 670 | 0.23 | 19 min |
| #2 | monkey47 | 230 | 0.16 | 6 min |
| #3 | BogdanBogi | 226 | 0.25 | 6 min |
| #4 | Babi22 | 218 | 0.16 | 5 min |
| #5 | Ora | 111 | 0.14 | 3 min |





