








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 729 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 294 matches | ||
| Wingman | 211 matches | ||
| Faceit | 48 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 14 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5669 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,568 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6332 | 41% |
| Smokes | 1876 | 12% |
| HE Grenades | 5554 | 36% |
| Molotovs | 1806 | 12% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,147,361 of utility $173 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 608 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ludvig Sjögren | 58% | 38 |
| #2 | Hitode | 50% | 129 |
| #3 | G-Dane | 47% | 336 |
| #4 | Gorgi | 47% | 83 |
| #5 | Maciejus4000 | 47% | 96 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Hitode | 50% | 129 |
| #3 | G-Dane | 47% | 336 |
| #4 | Gorgi | 47% | 83 |
| #5 | Maciejus4000 | 47% | 96 |
| #6 | quac | 38% | 60 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | G-Dane | 19 | 0.0029 |
| #2 | Hitode | 6 | 0.0022 |
| #3 | Gorgi | 5 | 0.0028 |
| #4 | quac | 4 | 0.0035 |
| #5 | Maciejus4000 | 3 | 0.0017 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hitode | 385 | 0.14 | 8 min |
| #2 | G-Dane | 183 | 0.03 | 5 min |
| #3 | quac | 118 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| #4 | Gorgi | 103 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| #5 | Ludvig Sjögren | 83 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ludvig Sjögren | +4.21 | 85 | 59 |
| #2 | Hitode | +0.84 | 67 | 56 |
| #3 | soldieR | +0.65 | 52 | 66 |
| #4 | G-Dane | -0.18 | 62 | 47 |
| #5 | Maciejus4000 | -1.20 | 60 | 26 |





