










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 246 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Nuke | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Premier | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 10 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
937 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,837 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 822 | 29% |
| Smokes | 568 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 710 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 737 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $438,705 of utility $213 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 140 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kontrast | 17 | 0.0131 |
| #2 | nilce | 17 | 0.0236 |
| #3 | яizµ | 12 | 0.0233 |
| #4 | Evie Langley Shikinami | 6 | 0.0061 |
| #5 | seixas | 6 | 0.0182 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kontrast | 223 | 0.17 | 6 min |
| #2 | Evie Langley Shikinami | 94 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #3 | яizµ | 55 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| #4 | seixas | 32 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #5 | kagiura | 29 | 0.21 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | seixas | +4.69 | 76 | 48 |
| #2 | Kontrast | +3.94 | 88 | 52 |
| #3 | kagiura | +2.84 | 76 | 60 |
| #4 | White scintillation | +2.41 | 78 | 59 |
| #5 | nilce | +1.15 | 54 | 13 |





