










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 108 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September

The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
238 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 517 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 201 | 39% |
| Smokes | 52 | 10% |
| HE Grenades | 120 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 144 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $234,066 of utility $190 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 3 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | uEnvy | 57% | 7 |
| #2 | Tazo | 48% | 27 |
| #3 | HydroReign | 47% | 36 |
| #4 | andy | 40% | 10 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | uEnvy | 57% | 7 |
| #2 | Tazo | 48% | 27 |
| #3 | HydroReign | 47% | 36 |
| #4 | andy | 40% | 10 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | HydroReign | 7 | 0.0098 |
| #2 | andy | 3 | 0.0133 |
| #3 | Tazo | 1 | 0.0018 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | HydroReign | 100 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| #2 | andy | 78 | 0.35 | 2 min |
| #3 | Tazo | 62 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| #4 | uEnvy | 11 | 0.08 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tazo | +5.43 | 42 | 51 |
| #2 | andy | +1.15 | 66 | 67 |
| #3 | HydroReign | +0.64 | 27 | 55 |
| #4 | uEnvy | -1.41 | 24 | 62 |
| #5 | midget_boy24 | -4.81 | 15 | 26 |





