








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 404 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 276 matches | ||
| Premier | 171 matches | ||
| Wingman | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 23 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




21 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5655 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 20,124 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5415 | 27% |
| Smokes | 5966 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 4377 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 4366 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,343,031 of utility $114 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 419 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #14 | Insane | 46% | 191 |
| #15 | thiago14 | 41% | 66 |
| #16 | Lacdemon | 39% | 41 |
| #17 | KillaX | 38% | 79 |
| #18 | DesaH | 37% | 52 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sum® | 19 | 0.0065 |
| #2 | ramimirez | 14 | 0.0093 |
| #3 | Yak1ro | 11 | 0.0059 |
| #4 | Insane | 6 | 0.0014 |
| #5 | Mankarlit0s | 4 | 0.0056 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Insane | 1755 | 0.41 | 47 min |
| #2 | sum® | 537 | 0.19 | 13 min |
| #3 | KillaX | 474 | 0.27 | 12 min |
| #4 | Sus Shiber* | 377 | 0.15 | 8 min |
| #5 | ramimirez | 351 | 0.23 | 9 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ramimirez | +2.09 | 75 | 63 |
| #2 | 𓆰TachoPayus𓆪 | +1.53 | 81 | 65 |
| #3 | 天使 | +1.45 | 81 | 67 |
| #4 | sum® | +1.10 | 75 | 70 |
| #5 | Sus Shiber* | +1.01 | 80 | 67 |





