








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1107 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 321 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 8 matches | ||
| Faceit | 7 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 19 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




23 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4424 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 17,122 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4385 | 26% |
| Smokes | 4323 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 3649 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 4765 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,252,662 of utility $123 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 165 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DoctorMoctor | 61% | 114 |
| #2 | Råbe | 59% | 34 |
| #3 | Naksu | 55% | 411 |
| #4 | teukhaa | 51% | 57 |
| #5 | Iglumeister | 48% | 65 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DoctorMoctor | 61% | 114 |
| #2 | Råbe | 59% | 34 |
| #3 | Naksu | 55% | 411 |
| #4 | teukhaa | 51% | 57 |
| #5 | Iglumeister | 48% | 65 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Naksu | 54 | 0.0064 |
| #2 | DoctorMoctor | 9 | 0.0037 |
| #3 | teukhaa | 3 | 0.0024 |
| #4 | Råbe | 3 | 0.0042 |
| #5 | Iglumeister | 1 | 0.0007 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Naksu | 1992 | 0.24 | 51 min |
| #2 | Iglumeister | 271 | 0.20 | 7 min |
| #3 | DoctorMoctor | 191 | 0.08 | 6 min |
| #4 | teukhaa | 145 | 0.12 | 4 min |
| #5 | Råbe | 69 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Naksu | +1.67 | 77 | 72 |
| #2 | Råbe | +1.51 | 91 | 57 |
| #3 | Mini | +1.29 | 64 | 61 |
| #4 | teukhaa | +0.80 | 66 | 67 |
| #5 | Iglumeister | +0.29 | 70 | 66 |





