








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 382 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Anubis | 364 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 219 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 82 matches | ||
| Premier | 58 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 111 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




80 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3864 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,081 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 524 | 5% |
| Smokes | 276 | 3% |
| HE Grenades | 6773 | 67% |
| Molotovs | 2508 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,183,018 of utility $75 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 868 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | papi | 49% | 720 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | papi | 49% | 720 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | papi | 62 | 0.0044 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | papi | 3076 | 0.22 | 78 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | papi | +5.39 | 78 | 85 |
| #2 | cawpy | -4.63 | 42 | 26 |





