








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 81 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 63 matches | ||
| Premier | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 12 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
998 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,279 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 534 | 16% |
| Smokes | 782 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 876 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 1087 | 33% |
Our logs show you have wasted $330,901 of utility $124 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1 message into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | XinG | 58% | 59 |
| #2 | ℋℬ𝒲. | 52% | 23 |
| #3 | 青春猪头少年zz | 52% | 91 |
| #4 | THEONE | 45% | 76 |
| #5 | 苇名打铁匠 | 14% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | XinG | 58% | 59 |
| #2 | ℋℬ𝒲. | 52% | 23 |
| #3 | 青春猪头少年zz | 52% | 91 |
| #4 | THEONE | 45% | 76 |
| #5 | 苇名打铁匠 | 14% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | XinG | 4 | 0.0031 |
| #2 | 青春猪头少年zz | 2 | 0.0010 |
| #3 | THEONE | 1 | 0.0006 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 青春猪头少年zz | 447 | 0.22 | 9 min |
| #2 | THEONE | 221 | 0.13 | 5 min |
| #3 | XinG | 200 | 0.15 | 5 min |
| #4 | ℋℬ𝒲. | 59 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| #5 | 苇名打铁匠 | 20 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | XinG | +3.87 | 84 | 54 |
| #2 | THEONE | +0.64 | 74 | 60 |
| #3 | ℋℬ𝒲. | -0.49 | 68 | 57 |
| #4 | 青春猪头少年zz | -0.62 | 67 | 55 |
| #5 | Vershust_o | -1.74 | 60 | 43 |





