








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 446 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 74 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Faceit | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 16 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1247 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,075 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1608 | 26% |
| Smokes | 1575 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 1494 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 1398 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $227,906 of utility $86 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 146 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #12 | mirjami95 | 52% | 31 |
| #13 | Henkk4aw | 50% | 8 |
| #14 | Snake | 45% | 11 |
| #15 | Läski_Timo | 43% | 7 |
| #16 | ★MikkoKoo | 36% | 11 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Aleksi22 | 8 | 0.0066 |
| #2 | Tooni | 5 | 0.0063 |
| #3 | mirjami95 | 3 | 0.0046 |
| #4 | ^Kuppi^ | 3 | 0.0085 |
| #5 | PATU | 3 | 0.0091 |





