








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 6 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 4 different maps




Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




0 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Your loyalty is impressive.
43 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 19 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 11 | 58% |
| Smokes | 2 | 11% |
| HE Grenades | 1 | 5% |
| Molotovs | 5 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,450 of utility $28 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1 message into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 02 | 40% | 5 |
| #2 | Hepuli csgocases_com | 33% | 3 |
| #3 | PontiusPilatus | 29% | 7 |
| #4 | Kähmijä | 25% | 4 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 02 | 40% | 5 |
| #2 | Hepuli csgocases_com | 33% | 3 |
| #3 | PontiusPilatus | 29% | 7 |
| #4 | Kähmijä | 25% | 4 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PontiusPilatus | 1 | 0.0081 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PontiusPilatus | 9 | 0.07 | 0 min |
| #2 | 02 | 8 | 0.09 | 0 min |
| #3 | Hepuli csgocases_com | 3 | 0.05 | 0 min |
| #4 | Kähmijä | 2 | 0.03 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 02 | +0.23 | 76 | 62 |
| #2 | Kähmijä | -0.01 | 50 | 24 |
| #3 | Hepuli csgocases_com | -1.29 | 50 | 15 |
| #4 | Frob | -1.85 | 54 | 13 |
| #5 | PontiusPilatus | -5.93 | 28 | 49 |





