








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 209 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 81 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 14 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




42 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1259 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,898 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1240 | 25% |
| Smokes | 1559 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 1083 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 1016 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $421,938 of utility $130 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 53 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ɑ͞ ̶͞ ̶͞ ﻝﮞ | 69% | 13 |
| #2 | Fat | 53% | 104 |
| #3 | Sanemania | 49% | 158 |
| #4 | 2Ace | 48% | 98 |
| #5 | Lössi | 47% | 73 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ɑ͞ ̶͞ ̶͞ ﻝﮞ | 69% | 13 |
| #2 | Fat | 53% | 104 |
| #3 | Sanemania | 49% | 158 |
| #4 | 2Ace | 48% | 98 |
| #5 | Lössi | 47% | 73 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sanemania | 23 | 0.0074 |
| #2 | Fat | 11 | 0.0054 |
| #3 | Lössi | 11 | 0.0079 |
| #4 | 2Ace | 10 | 0.0052 |
| #5 | Ɑ͞ ̶͞ ̶͞ ﻝﮞ | 2 | 0.0097 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sanemania | 320 | 0.10 | 8 min |
| #2 | Lössi | 204 | 0.15 | 4 min |
| #3 | 2Ace | 141 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| #4 | Fat | 33 | 0.02 | 1 min |
| #5 | Ɑ͞ ̶͞ ̶͞ ﻝﮞ | 7 | 0.03 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fat | +1.41 | 77 | 35 |
| #2 | Sanemania | +0.53 | 41 | 62 |
| #3 | Lössi | +0.07 | 67 | 50 |
| #4 | Arde | -0.14 | 52 | 56 |
| #5 | 2Ace | -0.50 | 33 | 58 |





