








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 195 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Train | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 5 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1238 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,234 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1007 | 45% |
| Smokes | 628 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 437 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 162 | 7% |
Our logs show you have wasted $524,929 of utility $154 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 175 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sans | 52% | 63 |
| #2 | ΔP | 45% | 137 |
| #3 | subtropical | 44% | 27 |
| #4 | kohaena hater | 40% | 25 |
| #5 | nugget | 36% | 11 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sans | +6.64 | 75 | 60 |
| #2 | ΔP | +4.76 | 88 | 40 |
| #3 | kohaena hater | +2.71 | 48 | 67 |
| #4 | bacc for snacc | -1.18 | 39 | 45 |
| #5 | subtropical | -2.07 | 35 | 40 |





