








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 42 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 5 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
160 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 282 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 89 | 32% |
| Smokes | 92 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 47 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 54 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $33,584 of utility $155 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 19 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Musse | 67% | 6 |
| #2 | Chair | 63% | 8 |
| #3 | Jerry | 63% | 8 |
| #4 | KaspiBoi | 50% | 4 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Musse | 67% | 6 |
| #2 | Chair | 63% | 8 |
| #3 | Jerry | 63% | 8 |
| #4 | KaspiBoi | 50% | 4 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jerry | 5 | 0.0299 |
| #2 | Musse | 3 | 0.0250 |
| #3 | Chair | 1 | 0.0060 |
| #4 | KaspiBoi | 1 | 0.0123 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jerry | 24 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| #2 | Musse | 19 | 0.16 | 0 min |
| #3 | Chair | 18 | 0.11 | 0 min |
| #4 | KaspiBoi | 3 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | πΎπ΅π½π»πͺβ’ | +5.59 | 75 | 49 |
| #2 | Musse | +3.42 | 39 | 38 |
| #3 | Chair | -1.32 | 65 | 61 |
| #4 | KaspiBoi | -2.09 | 16 | 27 |
| #5 | Jerry | -2.21 | 40 | 52 |





