








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 184 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 58 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1357 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,717 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1648 | 29% |
| Smokes | 852 | 15% |
| HE Grenades | 1681 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 1536 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $238,337 of utility $74 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 61 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PARAZZIT | 75% | 12 |
| #2 | Spin2s | 64% | 14 |
| #3 | واشتريت لنفسك مو | 53% | 19 |
| #4 | Kebab | 50% | 10 |
| #5 | buuboo4ka ♥ | 46% | 26 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | buuboo4ka ♥ | 3 | 0.0058 |
| #2 | ?!. | 2 | 0.0033 |
| #3 | واشتريت لنفسك مو | 2 | 0.0056 |
| #4 | Spin2s | 2 | 0.0072 |
| #5 | Busty Monica | 1 | 0.0034 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ?!. | 87 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| #2 | buuboo4ka ♥ | 80 | 0.15 | 1 min |
| #3 | Gustavo Fring | 63 | 0.20 | 1 min |
| #4 | Busty Monica | 29 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #5 | Spin2s | 28 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ?!. | +4.72 | 79 | 77 |
| #2 | Kebab | +2.29 | 83 | 48 |
| #3 | Eddie | +1.02 | 68 | 62 |
| #4 | buuboo4ka ♥ | +0.53 | 44 | 61 |
| #5 | PARAZZIT | +0.44 | 56 | 48 |





