








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 68 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 77 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




15 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1278 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,905 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 753 | 26% |
| Smokes | 950 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 371 | 13% |
| Molotovs | 831 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $280,608 of utility $116 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 242 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Chico | 73% | 11 |
| #2 | Obscurity | 71% | 14 |
| #3 | sevorek | 70% | 10 |
| #4 | ZoRaX | 52% | 23 |
| #5 | . | 50% | 6 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | BORSALINO | 50% | 14 |
| #7 | Tornado | 46% | 26 |
| #8 | Fatih_m | 44% | 16 |
| #9 | ✪ SpaRKer ' | 40% | 10 |
| #10 | JuRaSuS | 14% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sevorek | 3 | 0.0164 |
| #2 | Tornado | 2 | 0.0036 |
| #3 | ZoRaX | 2 | 0.0042 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ZoRaX | 114 | 0.24 | 3 min |
| #2 | Tornado | 106 | 0.19 | 3 min |
| #3 | Fatih_m | 71 | 0.21 | 2 min |
| #4 | Obscurity | 60 | 0.21 | 3 min |
| #5 | Chico | 54 | 0.24 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sevorek | +2.96 | 74 | 65 |
| #2 | Obscurity | +1.38 | 74 | 83 |
| #3 | Chico | +1.27 | 86 | 76 |
| #4 | ✪ SpaRKer ' | +1.17 | 81 | 67 |
| #5 | Tornado | +0.12 | 78 | 71 |





