








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 150 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 185 matches | ||
| Faceit | 25 matches | ||
| Wingman | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Renown | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 15 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2282 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,247 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2668 | 32% |
| Smokes | 2004 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 1871 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 1704 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $892,156 of utility $147 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 83 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Smokyn | 63% | 48 |
| #2 | hotsauce | 60% | 25 |
| #3 | Ferkster | 59% | 66 |
| #4 | Alex | 53% | 157 |
| #5 | hotsauce | 51% | 105 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Alex | 404 | 0.12 | 9 min |
| #2 | Bobby | 125 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| #3 | hotsauce | 119 | 0.05 | 4 min |
| #4 | Smokyn | 107 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| #5 | [CTRI]AmN | 70 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Smokyn | +3.32 | 69 | 60 |
| #2 | hotsauce | +1.16 | 63 | 58 |
| #3 | Alex | +0.99 | 29 | 60 |
| #4 | MrF | +0.33 | 65 | 60 |
| #5 | hotsauce | +0.27 | 54 | 47 |





