








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 14 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 329 matches | ||
| Premier | 19 matches | ||
| Faceit | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




51 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2094 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,557 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2207 | 34% |
| Smokes | 1518 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 1448 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 1384 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $361,923 of utility $64 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 17 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | iiChewwy | 52% | 25 |
| #2 | nayd3 | 51% | 51 |
| #3 | Floowy | 43% | 348 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | iiChewwy | 52% | 25 |
| #2 | nayd3 | 51% | 51 |
| #3 | Floowy | 43% | 348 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Floowy | 5 | 0.0010 |
| #2 | nayd3 | 1 | 0.0010 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Floowy | 582 | 0.12 | 13 min |
| #2 | nayd3 | 175 | 0.17 | 5 min |
| #3 | iiChewwy | 35 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Leo4k | +1.79 | 72 | 44 |
| #2 | Floowy | -1.86 | 36 | 54 |
| #3 | nayd3 | -2.20 | 29 | 69 |
| #4 | iiChewwy | -4.38 | 37 | 53 |





