








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 751 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 370 matches | ||
| Faceit | 33 matches | ||
| Wingman | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 49 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




48 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4358 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,433 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4481 | 29% |
| Smokes | 2978 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 4738 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 3236 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,301,765 of utility $138 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2823 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jörtikkä Kaisa CS.PRO | 52% | 438 |
| #2 | Jyke "Esimies" Reimanen | 49% | 55 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jörtikkä Kaisa CS.PRO | 52% | 438 |
| #2 | Jyke "Esimies" Reimanen | 49% | 55 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jörtikkä Kaisa CS.PRO | 54 | 0.0060 |
| #2 | Jyke "Esimies" Reimanen | 1 | 0.0009 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jörtikkä Kaisa CS.PRO | 2273 | 0.25 | 52 min |
| #2 | Jyke "Esimies" Reimanen | 26 | 0.02 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | pussy magnet | +1.00 | 79 | 61 |
| #2 | Jörtikkä Kaisa CS.PRO | -0.09 | 48 | 71 |
| #3 | Jyke "Esimies" Reimanen | -0.46 | 70 | 46 |





