








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 3107 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Nuke | 1038 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 112 matches | ||
| Premier | 87 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 83 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 69 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 16 matches | ||
| Wingman | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 4 matches | ||
| Faceit | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 21 different maps





Our logs show 130 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




314 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
18733 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 23,593 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 8219 | 35% |
| Smokes | 989 | 4% |
| HE Grenades | 10476 | 44% |
| Molotovs | 3909 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $5,103,350 of utility $162 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 4279 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Konglionel | 54% | 198 |
| #2 | jolly prochix | 47% | 154 |
| #3 | BapperButcher | 47% | 91 |
| #4 | NuttyNimbus | 45% | 228 |
| #5 | the big dawg | 44% | 398 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | the big dawg | 220 | 0.0279 |
| #2 | NuttyNimbus | 78 | 0.0173 |
| #3 | Konglionel | 50 | 0.0133 |
| #4 | Vilém Kolombo | 47 | 0.0267 |
| #5 | jolly prochix | 44 | 0.0147 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Konglionel | 458 | 0.12 | 10 min |
| #2 | NuttyNimbus | 272 | 0.06 | 5 min |
| #3 | BapperButcher | 227 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| #4 | the big dawg | 128 | 0.02 | 2 min |
| #5 | jolly prochix | 115 | 0.04 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Konglionel | +4.87 | 79 | 55 |
| #2 | BLEACH_GUZZLER_98 | +1.21 | 57 | 51 |
| #3 | jolly prochix | +0.45 | 55 | 23 |
| #4 | BapperButcher | +0.36 | 48 | 31 |
| #5 | Vilém Kolombo | -0.61 | 46 | 5 |





