








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 6 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 57 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1112 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,893 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 674 | 17% |
| Smokes | 1179 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 1034 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 1006 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $155,290 of utility $66 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | BashaAnts | 57% | 14 |
| #3 | John Chilling | 56% | 41 |
| #4 | Krexs | 44% | 57 |
| #5 | Kaur Mops | 33% | 18 |
| #6 | gspotlol | 31% | 13 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Krexs | 8 | 0.0072 |
| #2 | Kaur Mops | 5 | 0.0155 |
| #3 | gspotlol | 4 | 0.0188 |
| #4 | John Chilling | 1 | 0.0012 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | John Chilling | +2.10 | 63 | 56 |
| #2 | BashaAnts | +0.50 | 75 | 54 |
| #3 | HEBEL | +0.02 | 66 | 61 |
| #4 | Krexs | -0.62 | 63 | 74 |
| #5 | Kaur Mops | -0.78 | 33 | 11 |





