








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 220 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 149 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 55 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 42 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 29 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




42 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3532 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,563 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3964 | 32% |
| Smokes | 3094 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 3049 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 2456 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $818,868 of utility $117 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 461 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | r | 57% | 101 |
| #2 | おやすみ | 54% | 147 |
| #3 | Wutong | 52% | 214 |
| #4 | b2ber | 52% | 91 |
| #5 | Mako | 48% | 145 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | おやすみ | 46 | 0.0158 |
| #2 | r | 20 | 0.0098 |
| #3 | Mako | 14 | 0.0050 |
| #4 | b2ber | 13 | 0.0076 |
| #5 | Wutong | 12 | 0.0029 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Wutong | 837 | 0.20 | 18 min |
| #2 | おやすみ | 617 | 0.21 | 12 min |
| #3 | r | 265 | 0.13 | 6 min |
| #4 | b2ber | 202 | 0.12 | 4 min |
| #5 | Mako | 199 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | r | +1.88 | 63 | 48 |
| #2 | Evr | +1.82 | 70 | 66 |
| #3 | Wutong | +0.80 | 66 | 57 |
| #4 | b2ber | +0.65 | 64 | 44 |
| #5 | おやすみ | +0.31 | 56 | 51 |





