








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 213 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 82 matches | ||
| Premier | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




20 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1529 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,240 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1626 | 50% |
| Smokes | 290 | 9% |
| HE Grenades | 536 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 788 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $382,665 of utility $101 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 21 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Xfridged | 56% | 75 |
| #2 | Smoolyface | 55% | 64 |
| #3 | ZIAN KILLER | 50% | 148 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Xfridged | 56% | 75 |
| #2 | Smoolyface | 55% | 64 |
| #3 | ZIAN KILLER | 50% | 148 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ZIAN KILLER | 17 | 0.0062 |
| #2 | Smoolyface | 9 | 0.0101 |
| #3 | Xfridged | 3 | 0.0023 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Smoolyface | 74 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #2 | ZIAN KILLER | 66 | 0.02 | 2 min |
| #3 | Xfridged | 17 | 0.01 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Simply | +2.06 | 54 | 42 |
| #2 | Smoolyface | +0.58 | 38 | 38 |
| #3 | ZIAN KILLER | -1.67 | 25 | 43 |
| #4 | Xfridged | -2.71 | 20 | 19 |





