








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 708 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Esplay | 44 matches | 2,260 | |
| Faceit | 18 matches | ||
| Premier | 15 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1180 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,490 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 906 | 26% |
| Smokes | 877 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 759 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 948 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $299,980 of utility $151 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 195 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hagis | 78% | 9 |
| #2 | Sjeiken | 67% | 24 |
| #3 | SiddeBror | 64% | 28 |
| #4 | -S1mpe ✞ | 50% | 14 |
| #5 | arvid | 50% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | arvid | 50% | 18 |
| #6 | Trollet Under Bron | 48% | 23 |
| #7 | rull | 40% | 10 |
| #8 | Leis | 29% | 7 |
| #9 | Leon1das- | 17% | 6 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Trollet Under Bron | 1 | 0.0019 |
| #2 | Leon1das- | 1 | 0.0075 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sjeiken | 81 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| #2 | arvid | 79 | 0.19 | 2 min |
| #3 | -S1mpe ✞ | 46 | 0.15 | 1 min |
| #4 | hagis | 37 | 0.19 | 1 min |
| #5 | SiddeBror | 35 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tim e kungen av STUK | +4.26 | 86 | 59 |
| #2 | hagis | +2.69 | 91 | 67 |
| #3 | arvid | +2.69 | 90 | 58 |
| #4 | Sjeiken | +2.31 | 87 | 61 |
| #5 | Leon1das- | +1.21 | 77 | 65 |





