








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 397 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 66 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show 22 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
704 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,432 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 519 | 21% |
| Smokes | 680 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 627 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 606 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $459,233 of utility $263 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 42 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Philipp Banksy #4.20 | 75% | 12 |
| #2 | GoldenTimeGamer | 58% | 19 |
| #3 | Ich Jage dicke Kinder mit Gemüs | 57% | 7 |
| #4 | Mino 미노 | 50% | 6 |
| #5 | ✞ঔৣΔΣGIS༻꧂ | 50% | 8 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DerEselreiter | +6.84 | 81 | 74 |
| #2 | Hasbulla | +5.79 | 81 | 67 |
| #3 | Philipp Banksy #4.20 | +3.48 | 69 | 66 |
| #4 | Pfeffi | Maik | +3.08 | 66 | 65 |
| #5 | GoldenTimeGamer | -0.11 | 61 | 27 |





