








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 435 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 244 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 65 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 42 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 25 matches | ||
| Faceit | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 11 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 47 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




49 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5131 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 19,614 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5108 | 26% |
| Smokes | 3972 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 4850 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 5684 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,396,931 of utility $202 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1247 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | R3LAX | 54% | 69 |
| #2 | Snowy | 50% | 310 |
| #3 | CRANKROD | 47% | 326 |
| #4 | BaliforniaRoll | 46% | 268 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | R3LAX | 54% | 69 |
| #2 | Snowy | 50% | 310 |
| #3 | CRANKROD | 47% | 326 |
| #4 | BaliforniaRoll | 46% | 268 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BaliforniaRoll | 12 | 0.0022 |
| #2 | CRANKROD | 7 | 0.0010 |
| #3 | R3LAX | 3 | 0.0021 |
| #4 | Snowy | 1 | 0.0002 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Snowy | 1212 | 0.19 | 33 min |
| #2 | CRANKROD | 630 | 0.09 | 16 min |
| #3 | BaliforniaRoll | 541 | 0.10 | 13 min |
| #4 | R3LAX | 161 | 0.11 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Snowy | +4.90 | 85 | 77 |
| #2 | R3LAX | +0.20 | 64 | 66 |
| #3 | fakie | -0.69 | 67 | 65 |
| #4 | BaliforniaRoll | -1.76 | 59 | 65 |
| #5 | CRANKROD | -2.01 | 54 | 55 |





