








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1007 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 223 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 160 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 121 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 81 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 60 matches | ||
| Faceit | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 68 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




211 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8594 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 32,184 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 8304 | 26% |
| Smokes | 8787 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 6941 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 8152 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,995,064 of utility $127 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 4662 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #11 | tallaj | 80% | 49 |
| #12 | LilBiggz | 71% | 49 |
| #13 | lets get crasy | 62% | 47 |
| #14 | N1ps | 54% | 69 |
| #15 | Alex | 51% | 55 |





