








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 429 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 63 matches | ||
| Faceit | 53 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 23 matches | ||
| Premier | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 20 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3223 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,598 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3578 | 34% |
| Smokes | 2025 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 2629 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 2366 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $467,899 of utility $85 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 220 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Lord Bubble Daddy Supreme | 68% | 25 |
| #5 | GuineaPigGuy | 65% | 26 |
| #6 | Sephreh | 64% | 56 |
| #7 | Rapid | 60% | 20 |
| #8 | zmr- | 56% | 25 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Boxel | +3.09 | 68 | 69 |
| #2 | Sephreh | +2.22 | 73 | 74 |
| #3 | Moiven | +2.20 | 82 | 46 |
| #4 | natural | +1.37 | 79 | 60 |
| #5 | GuineaPigGuy | -0.33 | 65 | 61 |





