








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 103 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 27 matches | ||
| Wingman | 15 matches | ||
| Premier | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




21 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1068 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,134 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1138 | 36% |
| Smokes | 608 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 703 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 685 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $384,926 of utility $168 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 26 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nikob1w0w | 69% | 16 |
| #2 | Olliteus | 67% | 24 |
| #3 | Syrgiizio | 54% | 79 |
| #4 | SakkeKing | 51% | 35 |
| #5 | FnutZ | 46% | 13 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Syrgiizio | 195 | 0.13 | 4 min |
| #2 | SakkeKing | 180 | 0.27 | 4 min |
| #3 | FnutZ | 74 | 0.29 | 1 min |
| #4 | Nikob1w0w | 72 | 0.24 | 2 min |
| #5 | Olliteus | 59 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Syrgiizio | +3.21 | 67 | 58 |
| #2 | Olliteus | +3.17 | 56 | 55 |
| #3 | Nikob1w0w | +1.58 | 54 | 79 |
| #4 | ogkuosmanen | -0.16 | 53 | 74 |
| #5 | FnutZ | -0.42 | 59 | 61 |





