










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 0 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.

| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




0 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Your loyalty is impressive.
166 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 546 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 268 | 49% |
| Smokes | 86 | 16% |
| HE Grenades | 104 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 88 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $107,418 of utility $165 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 21 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | N_Meh | 69% | 13 |
| #2 | (=_AmaDeus_=) | 57% | 7 |
| #3 | E34<3 | 13% | 8 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | N_Meh | 69% | 13 |
| #2 | (=_AmaDeus_=) | 57% | 7 |
| #3 | E34<3 | 13% | 8 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | E34<3 | 4 | 0.0237 |
| #2 | N_Meh | 3 | 0.0113 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | (=_AmaDeus_=) | 25 | 0.17 | 0 min |
| #2 | E34<3 | 19 | 0.11 | 0 min |
| #3 | N_Meh | 14 | 0.05 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | N_Meh | +3.68 | 59 | 52 |
| #2 | (=_AmaDeus_=) | -1.13 | 34 | 59 |
| #3 | SUN-BABY | -2.26 | 21 | 48 |
| #4 | E34<3 | -3.00 | 13 | 24 |





