








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 29 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 114 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




20 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1278 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,555 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 848 | 24% |
| Smokes | 721 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 1126 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 860 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $554,251 of utility $167 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 53 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | H3G - McLov1n | 53% | 32 |
| #2 | SMADDDO :* | 47% | 17 |
| #3 | injustice | 45% | 159 |
| #4 | Lodney | 45% | 49 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | H3G - McLov1n | 53% | 32 |
| #2 | SMADDDO :* | 47% | 17 |
| #3 | injustice | 45% | 159 |
| #4 | Lodney | 45% | 49 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | injustice | 21 | 0.0065 |
| #2 | Lodney | 5 | 0.0052 |
| #3 | H3G - McLov1n | 4 | 0.0059 |
| #4 | SMADDDO :* | 1 | 0.0028 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | injustice | 482 | 0.15 | 11 min |
| #2 | H3G - McLov1n | 111 | 0.16 | 3 min |
| #3 | Lodney | 45 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #4 | SMADDDO :* | 36 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | H3G - McLov1n | +2.70 | 69 | 61 |
| #2 | injustice | +1.94 | 68 | 61 |
| #3 | Lodney | -0.33 | 66 | 52 |
| #4 | Polski´injustice | -1.16 | 77 | 55 |
| #5 | SMADDDO :* | -4.24 | 26 | 61 |





