








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 884 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 535 matches | ||
| Faceit | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 26 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




92 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7166 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,149 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5151 | 36% |
| Smokes | 4767 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 2324 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 1907 | 13% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,825,899 of utility $146 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1772 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | womp | 36% | 36 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | womp | 36% | 36 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | womp | 7 | 0.0086 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | womp | 117 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Road to gloabal | +2.44 | 81 | 49 |
| #2 | womp | +0.67 | 84 | 57 |





