








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 984 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 120 matches | ||
| Wingman | 58 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 58 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 83 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




29 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3211 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,660 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2500 | 29% |
| Smokes | 2245 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 1582 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 2333 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,274,175 of utility $140 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2081 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Performatívny muž | 49% | 81 |
| #2 | ✪nexus | 44% | 94 |
| #3 | mood | 40% | 60 |
| #4 | Already in use | 38% | 48 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Performatívny muž | 49% | 81 |
| #2 | ✪nexus | 44% | 94 |
| #3 | mood | 40% | 60 |
| #4 | Already in use | 38% | 48 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪nexus | 14 | 0.0076 |
| #2 | Performatívny muž | 14 | 0.0102 |
| #3 | mood | 14 | 0.0116 |
| #4 | Already in use | 5 | 0.0053 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Performatívny muž | 254 | 0.18 | 6 min |
| #2 | Already in use | 98 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #3 | ✪nexus | 96 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| #4 | mood | 66 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mood | +2.92 | 59 | 30 |
| #2 | Performatívny muž | +1.76 | 56 | 60 |
| #3 | ✪nexus | +1.40 | 59 | 50 |
| #4 | BattingChart002 | -0.58 | 52 | 41 |
| #5 | Already in use | -4.83 | 33 | 44 |





