








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 380 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 154 matches | ||
| Wingman | 101 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 52 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




62 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2296 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,440 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4638 | 44% |
| Smokes | 2901 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 1525 | 15% |
| Molotovs | 1376 | 13% |
Our logs show you have wasted $117,832 of utility $20 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1467 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kez | 52% | 44 |
| #2 | Breeze | 47% | 34 |
| #3 | E҉Y҉E҉L҉E҉S҉S҉ | 46% | 257 |
| #4 | jorge de guzman | 46% | 65 |
| #5 | Peps_ | 45% | 60 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | E҉Y҉E҉L҉E҉S҉S҉ | 624 | 0.13 | 14 min |
| #2 | jorge de guzman | 258 | 0.19 | 5 min |
| #3 | Peps_ | 202 | 0.16 | 5 min |
| #4 | kez | 122 | 0.14 | 3 min |
| #5 | Breeze | 118 | 0.17 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | E҉Y҉E҉L҉E҉S҉S҉ | +2.99 | 68 | 56 |
| #2 | kez | +1.59 | 90 | 63 |
| #3 | Breeze | +1.34 | 67 | 59 |
| #4 | jorge de guzman | +0.81 | 64 | 51 |
| #5 | Peps_ | -1.72 | 54 | 58 |





