








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 388 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 125 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 65 matches | ||
| Wingman | 50 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 28 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




80 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4026 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,093 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1894 | 31% |
| Smokes | 2166 | 36% |
| HE Grenades | 1276 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 757 | 12% |
Our logs show you have wasted $974,229 of utility $108 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 517 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Osama Been Ballin | 49% | 170 |
| #2 | Joe Momma | 40% | 77 |
| #3 | BenjaminPenjaminTheThird | 36% | 61 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Osama Been Ballin | 49% | 170 |
| #2 | Joe Momma | 40% | 77 |
| #3 | BenjaminPenjaminTheThird | 36% | 61 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Osama Been Ballin | 41 | 0.0125 |
| #2 | BenjaminPenjaminTheThird | 12 | 0.0115 |
| #3 | Joe Momma | 9 | 0.0058 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Osama Been Ballin | 227 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| #2 | Joe Momma | 83 | 0.05 | 3 min |
| #3 | BenjaminPenjaminTheThird | 56 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hexx | +2.35 | 75 | 37 |
| #2 | Joe Momma | -2.34 | 43 | 47 |
| #3 | Osama Been Ballin | -2.36 | 43 | 35 |
| #4 | BenjaminPenjaminTheThird | -2.42 | 54 | 35 |





