








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 470 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 236 matches | ||
| Wingman | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 19 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3292 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,579 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3057 | 29% |
| Smokes | 2404 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 2254 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 2864 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $939,021 of utility $145 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 141 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | akt | 51% | 102 |
| #6 | arthuryto | 49% | 99 |
| #7 | GRD | 46% | 24 |
| #8 | l | 45% | 132 |
| #9 | Lukais | 32% | 31 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Post_Malone | 16 | 0.0044 |
| #2 | l | 15 | 0.0055 |
| #3 | akt | 15 | 0.0071 |
| #4 | Lukais | 6 | 0.0090 |
| #5 | arthuryto | 5 | 0.0024 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Post_Malone | 576 | 0.16 | 15 min |
| #2 | akt | 485 | 0.23 | 11 min |
| #3 | arthuryto | 241 | 0.12 | 6 min |
| #4 | l | 216 | 0.08 | 4 min |
| #5 | Lukais | 93 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | eternity | +2.11 | 72 | 66 |
| #2 | akt | +1.48 | 80 | 64 |
| #3 | GRD | +1.21 | 76 | 51 |
| #4 | Post_Malone | +0.93 | 49 | 67 |
| #5 | Lukais | +0.23 | 80 | 38 |





